Superstar Keanu Reeves made his initial impact fairly early, in comedies like “Parenthood” and “Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure.” But in the 1990s, he became a big screen star with a string of hits, turning him from goofball to action hero even before securing the role of Neo in “The Matrix.” While you might expect Reeves’ most regrettable roles to have come in the ’80s before he was a big name, his worst might actually be in the 1993 comedy “Even Cowgirls Get the Blues” — yes, even more than his disastrous turn as Jonathan Harker in “Bram Stoker’s Dracula,” which was at least a great film.
“Cowgirls” stars Uma Thurman as a Southern belle, born with abnormally large thumbs, who hitchhikes across the country, starts a modeling career, and ends up at a bizarre “beauty ranch.” Along the way she encounters Julian Gitche, a mutton-chopped Native American played by Reeves, and the two have a brief romance. Reeves’ cameo was marketed, but ultimately doesn’t live up to the hype. The movie itself was roasted by , who called it “one of the more empty, pointless, baffling films I can remember, and the experience of viewing it is an exercise in nothingness.”
To be fair, Reeves doesn’t seem like the kind of guy who regrets anything, choosing to view even his lowest points as steps along a bigger path. But if there’s one role he laughs at himself for playing, we’d lay down money that it’s Julian Gitche.